This quote is so true. My kids are my light.
Buddy! Our family loves you so much. I am sorry we can't help you be less skittish and more comfortable. You are the most frightened, unsure dog I know. I say this every year and I mean it, but I am glad you have us to love you. Whoever owned you first sure did a number on you. You make us laugh and you're the only one in my family who cuddles with me right now! I hope we are being the family you need. I'm sorry if there's something we can be doing that we're not. You're a good boy and I love you.
My Dear Ryan,
You are one of a kind. You bring laughter and silliness everywhere you go. You remain the champion of "whoever laughs first loses" as Haley and I can't help but laugh at what you come up with to make us laugh. Your growth this year has been impressive. You have felt a bit discouraged at times, but it hasn't stopped you from trying and working on those things that challenge you. And THIS is where you need to see your strength. You are always working to be better. You express yourself and your thoughts and feelings in ways not many other 9 year olds do. You just bought a notebook in LA, with your own money, to give to a girl you have a crush on. You are brave! You are sensitive to others' hearts and feelings and you know what's right and wrong. You are awesome at trying new things and right now you are loving chess! You have the courage to own your mistakes and not repeat them. I want you to know how incredible you are. You are an amazing soul. I am here for you always. I want you to know that I see you. I want you to know that you are growing into a young man filled with love and integrity and you are everything I have ever hoped for in a son. I would not change one thing about you. I pray that I am the mom you need me to be. You are my light. You are my heart. I love you, buppy toe.
You are one of a kind. You bring laughter and silliness everywhere you go. You remain the champion of "whoever laughs first loses" as Haley and I can't help but laugh at what you come up with to make us laugh. Your growth this year has been impressive. You have felt a bit discouraged at times, but it hasn't stopped you from trying and working on those things that challenge you. And THIS is where you need to see your strength. You are always working to be better. You express yourself and your thoughts and feelings in ways not many other 9 year olds do. You just bought a notebook in LA, with your own money, to give to a girl you have a crush on. You are brave! You are sensitive to others' hearts and feelings and you know what's right and wrong. You are awesome at trying new things and right now you are loving chess! You have the courage to own your mistakes and not repeat them. I want you to know how incredible you are. You are an amazing soul. I am here for you always. I want you to know that I see you. I want you to know that you are growing into a young man filled with love and integrity and you are everything I have ever hoped for in a son. I would not change one thing about you. I pray that I am the mom you need me to be. You are my light. You are my heart. I love you, buppy toe.
This picture depicts how I saw you this year. I witnessed some weight being lifted off of your soul and your lightness (and your inner light) return in many many ways. I know things have been hard for you and you need to know it does not go unnoticed. You do not go unnoticed. Life is just hard sometimes and I cannot take it away, but I can and will be beside you and behind you. You are such a cool kid. You are easy to be around and have a great sense of humor. You are an extremely talented artist. I love hearing "Jackie" stories every day. I admire how hard you work in school and how diligent you are to stay on top of your work. I know you are having all the feelings and emotions a teenager has and I want you to know I am here for you. I want the best for you so when I talk to you about getting involved or putting yourself out there, it is not to push you into something you don't want to do. It's because I want you to experience all life has to offer. I have liked that you have opened up more and have talked about how you're feeling and have asked more questions. You are an amazing soul. I want you to know that I see you. I want you to know that you are everything I have ever hoped for in a daughter. I would not change one thing about you. You make me incredibly proud. I pray that I am the mom you need me to be. You are my light. You are my heart. I love you, tickle tee.
Well, damn. Although this year had lower lows than you had expected, it had higher highs too. There has been so much growth, hard insights, and realizations about yourself, and also an amazing reunion with feeling true happiness again. After this last, extremely challenging month, you have found resolve and determination to align yourself in character and soul. You have been out of your skin for so long, finding your way back. You've spent most of this past year feeling your new self but have also been challenged with mistakes you own and are ready to move on from. Your life is yours alone, to live. Do not fear. You can do hard things and you have. Be proud of how you handle yourself and the woman you are and continue to become. Be kind to yourself when you do things you wish you hadn't. You are human- a person with wonderful qualities and unattractive flaws. Continue to work to be better, but as Glennon Doyle Melton says, "focus less of self improvement and more on self love." Be honest with yourself and with others. Know that you are making your dad proud and that he sees you. Listen to your inner voice that always guides you the right way. Every time you've ignored it, you have steered off course. Do something you've never done this year. Continue to live in gratitude every single day and find joy in every aspect of your life. You are strong. Keep your eyes and heart forward and take what you need from the past to help you grow. There are no accidents. This is your journey and with every slip or downright sloppy fall, you're moving miles ahead. Love every cell of yourself- the good, bad and ugly. For goodness sake, finally watch "Seinfeld" so you get when people quote it. And as you always say, onward, forward, upward. YOU GOT THIS!
